How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

what dog doesnt have teeth? A horse.

What do you call shark with no dorsal fin? Unused ingredients for soup.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Why did Billy fall of his bike HE HAD NO BIKE

Roses are red, Violets are red, Daises are red, holy crap my garden is on fire.

The 17 year old buy called his computers support number to remove a virus from his old computer, so he can gift the computer to his little cousin for his birthday. But before giving the computer to his cousin he downloaded over 120 hours of adult film onto it.

What do you get when you cross a Kangaroo with a sheep? A: That would be impossible for it is impossible to breed a kangaroo and a sheep due to their difference in genetic material and number of chromosomes

Why did the man have an erection? He had just masturbated.

What can you never have for dinner? Breakfast and lunch

Who is so stupid they could literally be classified as mentally retarded? Evan Lovro

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

A dyslexic canadian walks into an arab

When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

A man walks into the market. He asks a young attractive employee in a smooth voice, "Do you have any honey here, baby?" The employee responds, "No sir. I'm sorry."

Me: Sometimes I like to talk to myself. Me: So do I.

How do u bring a dead person to life? U dont.

what's red, blue, and white all over? The American Flag

Guy 1: "Hey do you want to hear a joke?" Guy 2: "Sure" Guy 1: "No."

27

Why was the horse sad? Because it seen a Tesco van in the distance.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he felt like it.

what's orange, round, that like to play and kill poeple and not in a video game? a) a freaking orange b) a super ball c) a dog painted in orange d) samus aran e) none of the previous answer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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