give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

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What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. You racist.

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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Why can't women play poker? Because they're freaking stupid!

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What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or word combinations that begin with "F" and end in "uck," such as fat duck, so you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Two clarinets were locked in a case for 20 years. They both play well.

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Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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If Oscar Meyer had a dog what kind of dog would it be? A Wiener Dog!!

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how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

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What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

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Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

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A young boy walked into a hardware store and asked for a long weight. Luckily, the shop owner was kindly and brought the child up to speed on the process of hazing.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The chicken"

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Why did the little kid drop his ice cream? ...... Because he was startled by the pedophiles penis being shoved up his ass.

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Q: Why do Asian children tend to be smarter than other children A: They have longer school years

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I recently sent 10 puns to a joke website, hoping that one of them would win a competition. Unfortunately, they were deemed offensive.

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Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

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What do black people eat? What everyone else does!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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there once was a man named china who got stuck in yo mamas vagina he escaped through her butthole minus her butt mole and then died a horrible and painful death

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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