What do you call an animal killed on the side of the road? A false accusation towards an inanimate object that has no other purpose then providing a safe and smooth ride for drives all around the world.

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yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

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What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

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what this: b a dead one of these: p

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My dog has no dictionary. How does he spell terrible?

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A black man walks into a bank with a gun and askes where the safe is then procedes to shoots 3 white men inside of it. Everyone thanks him for stopping the armed bank robbers and he lives out the rest of his life in happiness for he is a hardworking cop and risks his life to save others.

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Mom says my name I reply Coming.

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You!!!!!! Cause your whole existence is just one big joke.

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What did Jamie get for Christmas? Nothing. Jamie is not friends with Christmas.

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What did Joe do after the party? He went home.

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

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Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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How can you know your roommate is gay? His dick has the taste of shit

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a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

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so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

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whay did the monkey fall out of the tree? he was dead. why did the cat fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

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why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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