Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

A man questions wether a cat will always land on it's feet. He takes a cat from a pet store and tosses it into the air. The cat lands on it's feet. Startled, the cat runs into the street and gets hit by a car. The man goes to prison for theft and animal abuse.

So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

What do you call someone who explores wild cave systems? A spelunker.

What do Jews and gays have in common? They both would have been killed during the Holocaust.

So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

Why couldn't the blonde do her homework? She had no fingers.

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

What did the unicorn eat for a snack? Nothing. Unicorns are a majestic fiction animal.

what's white and bumpy? Milk. But it's not bumpy.

Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

Why doesn't superman eat peanuts? Because he doesn't like them.

why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

Cripples are lame.

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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