Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

Knock Knock Jehovah's witnesses!

Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

Stop driving smart cars you fags

Sometimes Jamie wishes he could be a different person. He wishes he didnt have to eat dick everynight but it was all to late. He had to take it down the throat but he enjoyed the tickle it gave him

Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

What did the gay man die of? Obesity.

Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was getting chased by nazis.

If you are what you eat, then imagine a prostitute.

whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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How many people are in the world? More than one. -David Papile

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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