A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

Run, Run, As fast as you can, You can't catch me, I'm in a car.

What's sad about a pile of dead people? They didn't have life insurance.

What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well for a chicken to cross a road there would need to be a farm right next a road and, the fence in the farm would have to be torn for the chicken to get out and the chicken would probably end up not crossing the road because of cars.

Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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