A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

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I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

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An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

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Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

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Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

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Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

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What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

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Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

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When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

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someone tell england that a depressed guy smoking a cigarette is not a movie.

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What happened to the couple that got married? They went on their honeymoon.

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anti-joke.ru - russian style

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whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

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THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

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Hickory dickory dock, The mouse ran up the clock, Barbara called the exterminator, Who killed all 10 of them.

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What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

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how did the homeless man die? He got stabbed

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What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

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Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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