What did the broom say to the vacuum cleaner? "Your mom sucks."

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When did the laughter finally die? When you started this joke.

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Why was the black man in Jail? He works there as a correctional officer.

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Why did the gay kid drop his ice cream Because he got punched in the face.

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A family of five sit on a bench, the bench falls the family die.

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whats hairy and crys your mom

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Roses are red Violets are blue I look down My pants are brown.

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Gustavo Andrade

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what's black and can't swim? a black refrigerator

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What do you call a deer with one eye? Nothing. The deer was transported to a specialist animal hospital and now has two working eyes, eliminating the purpose of this joke. We apologise for wasting your time.

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

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Q: Why was the man eating his foot? A: Because he was a part of the circus.

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Your mom goes to college. Actually, she graduated a while back!

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For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

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A black person and a white person decide to have a race. Who won? The white person Don't be a racist.

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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What do you get when you mate a rhino with an elephant? Nothing. This mating cannot produce offspring.

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Why did Justin Beiber cut his hair It had grown to long

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

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Why was the Asian woman late for work? She was raped.

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Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

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Your momma's so obnoxious, your dad left.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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