You mama's so fat, that the doctor suggested that she go on a diet.

knock knock? whose there? i dont know. i dont know who? i dont know.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a brick at him.

Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

Roses are red Violets are blue Just smoked some Meth nelnfjknfkjnwkejnkjnwefkjnKJNFKJRNFKWNEFEJNFJNWKEJNWFKEJFN

Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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What Happens if a Muslim boy gives you a bomb? You give it to someone else as your playing tnt tag and the bombs a toy

why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

I can't stand being in a wheelchair.

who is an indian that can not shoot a bow and arrow? David

Q: Why did they bury the Indian? A: Because he was dead.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 encountered 7 in the Vietnam War where he killed 6's brothers, leaving him scarred. 6 has countless nightmares due to the numerous visions that reminisce that situation in great deal. Also, 7 had a big hook on his hand, which was very scary.

Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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