Once upon a time there lived 3 polar bears; a mummy polar bear, a daddy polar bear and a baby polar bear. Ond day the baby polar bear said to the daddy polar bear "I don't feel like a polar bear, I'm cold!" and the daddy polar bear said "You look like a polar bear."

Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

Q. Whats brown and sticky? A. Poo

What did the child molestor do? He went home and molested children.

Why did the fat person build a lift in his house? He was caring for his terminally ill mother which has a cancer and got both her legs amputated due to the cancer spreading to her legs.

Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

Anti jokes are stupid Anti jokes are dumb I'm a pedophile, You better run.

i saw amango it splootered

How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

What did 4 Year Old Jonny get for his birthday? Death.

Max Head fingered himself, HAH

Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

What did the flag say to the pole? It dosnt

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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