What did the depressed man get for his birthday? a rope

Why did I miss my bus? Because my watch was wrong.

Why couldnt the man buy food? Because.

What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

Why did the teenage girl pee on a stick? She and her boyfriend had foolishly engaged in unprotected sex two weeks before, and she was now concerned that she may be pregnant.

Why did the man have no head? It was blown off in Iraq 2 and days ago

Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death

Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

Hey Skrillex! Can you do me a favor and hold this bass for me? Sure thing, no problem. 3 seconds later... Oops! My bad! I just dropped it.

yada yada

I like my wine like I like my children... Eight years old and locked in a cellar

What do you call a black jew? Overcooked

why did the bus roll down the hill? Children were playing in the street.

Why did the blonde go to the post office? Because she received a phone call from them indicating that there was a package for her.

A man says to his doctor, "doctor, doctor, I think I have a split personality." The doctor responds, "That makes 4 of us."

A dyslexic man walks into a bar, he doesn't let a minor disablity distract him from having a good time.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

Liverpool City Football Club

Why is a duck? Because one leg is both the same.

Nero? You are alive? Holy shit! You are like so my hero! I love you man! I was so saddened to hear you where tortured and killed, but then I read about this "Axel Knight" and hoped it was you, it sure sounded like you! Please tell me its no joke, you are a hero around these parts, and we really miss you, honestly sir, is it true point zero has become some sort of utopia or are the painkillers making you a bit Hazy? I am Erica by the way, still with the order, but what is this about your empire?

Chuck Norris once stared in a show called Walker: Texas Ranger.

Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

What is worse than Jerry Sanduski? Nothing

What happened to the boy who crossed the road without looking both ways? He was abducted by aliens.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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