If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from KFC.

What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

How do you kill a blonde? You stab her many times in the ear with a fork......Then finsih her off with a spoon. No knives those hurts

If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

I took my blind grandmother to the art gallary

tennis grunts . . . no different from sex noises

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

2 black guys, a colombian guy and a white girl are sitting at a bar. They are friends.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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