How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

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I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

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There's nothing more natural than the coals under the fire...

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Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

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How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

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Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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What's more horrible than Twilight? Hitler.

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why was the black guy smelly? because his white friend threw him in a dumpster

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A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

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This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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Who is Dank? A: Billal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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