Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

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Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

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Ants are the Velociraptors of the insect world.

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What did the lawyer name is daughter? Caroline, in honor of his grandmother who died in THe Holocaust.

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

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Why was the baby flying? Because it's face was stapled to the propeller of a helicopter.

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What do Kobe Bryant and a toaster have in common? They both rape white women. Except for the toaster.

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Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

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Q:what did the 14 year old girl from Tennessee say to her dad when she lost her virginity? A: Get off of me

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

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Why did the girl fall off the stage? Someone shot her.

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A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

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A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

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What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

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Why do white people not eat crackers? Cause it's cannabalism.

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An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

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why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

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what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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