What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

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why did the chicken cross the road it didnt it got eaten

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Roses are red, violets are blue, twilight is gay and Justi Bieber too.

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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Whats 9 inches long, pink, and makes women scream? A miscarriage OuO

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Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike they both taste good

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Why did the lamborghini drive off the cliff? Because the person driving was a fridge

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Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

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What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

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Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

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What did your Little brother get for Christmas? Lice.

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Your dad must be a drug dealer because I saw him in your kitchen snorting cocaine

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What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

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What's brown, sticky, green, yellow, and orange that rides a unicycle? I have no clue, that's why I asked.

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Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

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Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

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Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

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How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops