Knock Knock Who's there? You You Who? Yes? Can I help you madam?

Three men are on a plane (note this is a low altitude plane) they're are going on they're 2nd grizzly bear hunting trip in Alaska. they crash into a mountain and all die. except the pilot. he left the wreckage and died from the freezing temperatures of an Alaskan winter.

A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!!!! lolooloL!OL!olO!LO!Lo!l!LO!L!O11P!lOL!oO!l

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

Have you heard of the Armenian genocide? No? Me neither.

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

like if your cool

Denard Robinson

What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...