Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, As you can tell...a lot of blood has been spilt today.

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How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Who cares? Why would a squirrel need to change a lightbulb?

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Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

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Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

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Why do black people make the best milkshakes? because they use the finest ingredients

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

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An alien, a midget, and a Jew walk into a bar... I forget the rest but your mom's a whore

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

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wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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Why was the prostitute's throat sore? Allergies.

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth A: A brick

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Whats grey and kills people, Terminal cancer,I lied about the grey color

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What did the fat man say to the other far man Hey your fat

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What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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"is it just me or is it getting really hot in here?" "the house is on fire and we are locked in"

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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