A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

A farmer accidentally trips his wife. She falls down the stairs and the farmer is quickly arrested for murder.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

I'm schizophrenic and so am I. I also happen suffer from multiple personality disorder. Schizophrenia refers to separation of mental functions, manifesting in anti-social behavior and delusions, and is unrelated to the separate disorder of dissociative identity disorder, popularly known as multiple personality disorder, characterized by at least two distinct and enduring identities and dissociated personality states. Both are crippling to normal behavior and function due to lack of public awareness and funding. Now get out of our ghost train or we'll cut you.

2 * 2 * 2 * 3 * 2417

Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

Q: Whats the difference between a trash can full of dead babies, and a porch? A: A porch isnt in my garage.

why did Kanye interrupt Taylor Swift at the VMA's? because he had a little too much scotch before the ceremony

Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

Jack and Jill went up the hill to get some exercise. They were getting terribly overweight.

whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

Why did Jimmy not go to school? Because Jimmy, along with his family, were killed in a horrible house fire. Knock Knock? Who's there? Not Jimmy...

Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

This is Mr.Bear you all are on rtc for the next week. See me in G7 NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

What did the snowman say to the other snowman? Do you smell carrots?

Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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