Why did the babysitter only get paid 50 cents for a whole day. Because he was a 6 foot mexican.

Q. What happened to the man that kept an open hand? A. He is in jail because he beat his family

Why don't vampires like garlic? Every vampires was raped by a garlic salesman.

Two condoms walk into a gay bar. The people in the bar are perplexed that two inanimate objects are capable of locomotion.

What does? 42

everyone lies especially if they said agree to terms of service

The asian parent's look at their child and say in an angry voice. "Y U NO DOCTOR." The kid was amazed how uneducated they were in english after living in america for 10 years.

How long does it take a blonde to skrew in a light bulb? Any amount of time; given that she knows that said bulb is in need of replace meant, or that said blonde is disabled, or if you thought I would make some kind of funny blonde joke that you would tell your friend and then forget ten minutes later, only to think of it a day later and claim it as your own.

25

Why was the drunk person arrested? He said to a police officer "I'm gay, so shut up you b****."

Why are Chinese women such bad drivers? Only company executives are fortunate enough to own cars in communist China. Furthermore, women are still in a subordinate class in many Eastern societies.

Q: What kind of punch do vampires drink ? A: None... It's really blood, you should know that by now.

TRICERATOPS!

Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

What's sadder than a dead baby? Any dead adult, considering how much more they've contributed to society.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

Why couldn't Kelly finish her test? She spontaneously combusted.

saftey torch you can out it on the porch. saftey torch put it in the hallway. saftey torch scare the monsters away. saftey torch that'll be 50 bucks.

Q: Why did the black man win the 100 meter dash? A: Because ever since he heard of this event, he has spent weeks preparing for it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? -I do not believe chickens like being questioned of their motives. We should leave them alone.

A man walks into a bar and breaks his nose, he asks the bartender for help The bartender says "no you're a f***ing idiot"

What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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