My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

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Why couldn't the gay man grow a beard? He shaved his face frequently.

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Why did the dead chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was dead.

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What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

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roses are red poo is poo

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's Basketball

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1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

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What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

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Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

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why did the plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

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What did one butthole say to the other butthole? I'm actually not sure. I wasn't there when he said it.

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A man stops another man on the street in Manhattan and asks "How do I get to Carnegie Hall ?" The other man gives him direction, including which subway stop to get off at.

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Romney: I think you would raise our debt and make more Americans jobless. Obama: It's just cuz I'm black!

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-Knock! Knock! -Who's there? -Bob. Is Brian's here? -Wrong adress. Brian's home is the first one at your right. -Oh sorry. Have a nice day.

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My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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A duck walks into a grocery store. He looks at the shopkeeper, who then grabs a broom and shoos him back outdoors.

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Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

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What? Huh?

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What's better than finding a $5.00 bill on the floor? Finding the person who actually owns it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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