What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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how did the kid cut open his forehead? by putting on his underwear!

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Anti Jokes = Drained

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

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why is your grandfather climbing up a pole? hes not

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roses are blue violets are blue everything is blue I'm sad now

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Why was the man afraid of the fish? He had ichthyophobia.

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Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

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What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

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Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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Q: Who would win in a fight, Chuck Norris, or a Tank? A: Chuck Norris, because his hidden fist in his chin gives him 3 fists to the tank's 0.

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a guy walkied into a bar... he really got hurt

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

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I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

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Why did billy have a frog stapled to his face? Because he was having a bad day.

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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What did the black kid say to the white kid My parents are slaves

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops