Why was the Mexican running? He was being chased by border patrol!

How did little jimmy survive the plane crash? He ate all the survivors, then when the helicopter arrived he ate them too and took the helicopter.

Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers. Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done. Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time. When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

Shelly tells Rob to go home... Thats what she said

How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

A Gamer walks into the tavern, the bartender says to him, "just dont act like you control the place!"

Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

what did the doctor say to another doctor? we are doctors

What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

What happened to The Guy when he got pissed on he was wet

What happened when the Irish ran out of potatoes? Millions starved.

How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

If I were in a room with you, Hitler, Stalin, and Palin, and I had a gun with 3 bullets in it, I would drop that gun and run as fast as I could from that room. Sorry, I hate you!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophobe a blow job

Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

Know what's worst than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Obama

Man one: Why does the moon look like a face? Man two: I don't know, why? Man one: I don't know either, that's why i asked....

What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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