Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Mama's going to buy you a mockingbird. If that mockingbird won't sing, Mama's going to buy you a another mockingbird.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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pobody's nerfect

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roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

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Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, because they have turned to alcoholism because there is no God. GO COMMUNISM, BOO AMERICA.

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What did the man say to the other man. Hi

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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1-"What's the worst thing about a joke?" 2-"The stupid punchlines at the end" 1-"No-- when someone dies and can't live to tell it..." (laughter) 3-"What joke you guys laughing at." 2-"None of you're business" 3-"Damn I really wanted to know" 1-"Didn't we all."

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whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

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Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

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What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

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I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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