How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two, but I don't know how they got in there.

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

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Ashton Kutcher meets a fine cougar at a bar and the cougar fatally wounded his throat.

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Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

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Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

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a man dyslexic into bar walks a

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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Why couldn't the blonde have kids? She had Ovarian Cancer.

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What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

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What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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Chris is hairy

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2 blondes were heading to Disney world, they saw up ahead that said "Disney World left" then took a left and enjoyed Disney World and had fun on the rides

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Why did the midget fall from a tall building? Because somebody pushed him.

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why was the little boy screaming. he realized he was an asian

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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a man walked into a bar today he suffers from depression from his wife leaving him and taking custody of the children on the grounds that he is an alcoholic and is unfit to raise children

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

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Incidentally,on the subject of friends, when do you actually classify someone as a friend? Is it: When you have been to each others' house; When you have had an intelligent conversation more than once; When you have stayed for dinner; Or perhaps simply when each has decided that the other is worth the air that they breathe? [L]

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Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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