are you MC Donald's because I'm lovin' it!

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Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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You're mama's so stupid, she decided to go back to school and finish her degree in Russian Literature to improve her self-esteem and maybe -- just maybe -- save her marriage, which had been on the rocks, mostly due to her intolerable self-loathing.

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guess what? bannanas

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2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

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Why did you mom shop at Wal-Mart? She had a coupon

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Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

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Roses are Black Violets are black I am colorblind, are you to?

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

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Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

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What did the pillow say to it's owner? Nothing. Pillows are not able to talk.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

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A apple a day keeps gramar away.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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