why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

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Incidentally,on the subject of friends, when do you actually classify someone as a friend? Is it: When you have been to each others' house; When you have had an intelligent conversation more than once; When you have stayed for dinner; Or perhaps simply when each has decided that the other is worth the air that they breathe? [L]

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Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Cheese in toast,

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Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

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*knock knock* i have diarrhea

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What did Rachel (the columbine girl) get for her birthday?? Nothing she's dead.

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What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

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whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

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Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

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Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

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What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

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Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

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What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

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What's worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? 47 dead babies stapled to trees (it's better if it's a nice, round number.)

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Why was Blue looking for her clue. She was drugged by a stranger and ended up inside of Mailbox.

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How do you kill a squirrel? Take the jaws of life. Rip it in half. And suck on the organs.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

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What do you call a black man with a gun? Officer.

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What do you call a man with no eyes? A hero for going to war and surviving being tortured by the Vietnamese.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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