What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

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my grandpa has the heart of a lion, and a permanent ban to the zoo.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

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Two black guys walk into a bar. They had too much alcoholic substances and got alcohol poisoning. Their families mourned for days and their kids grew u without a father. The end.

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What's the worlds most popular burger? The Krabby Patty

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Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

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An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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What did the paralyzed kid get for his 18th birthday? A boner.

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why did the hater hate? everyone else has a much better life

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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My mom told me and my brother to clean up o te commercial...but we were watching Netflix

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Why did Justin Beiber cut his hair It had grown to long

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What do you get when you mate a rhino with an elephant? Nothing. This mating cannot produce offspring.

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If a red house is made out of red bricks, and a blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is a green house made out of? Green bricks.

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Your mom goes to college. Actually, she graduated a while back!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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why cant black people swim? I dont know but they killed my family

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Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

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What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

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Q: Why was the child sad? A: because a doctor was taking bullet fragments out of his chest.

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A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops