How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

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what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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What does greg and Ian have in common?

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6 million, 1 to screw it in, and 5,999,999 to die in the holocaust.

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If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

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Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? I can't remember... :(

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What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

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why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in Milwaukee? They woke him up.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

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speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

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A horse and a group of people are the jury in a courtroom. They are expected to vote yay or nay of whether a supposed robber is guilty or not. The jury goes into their room. They come out, and the people vote yay. The room turns to the horse. The horse states his objection very thoughtfully, and then leaves the room.

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What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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What did the student say to the teacher, after being assigned homework? This isn't my best subject, can I stay after class for tutoring?

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

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A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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Why was the woman so hot? she was on fire

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How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

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Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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