why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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A mexican, Japanese, and American man are eating lunch one day at work by the window. The Mexican says, "Wow! If I get a taco one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The Japanese man says, "Wow! If I get a bowl or ramen one more time for lunch, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The American says" If I get grilled cheese one more time, I'm gonna jump off this window!" The next day, the mexican jumped off because he got a taco. Then, the japanese man jumped off for getting ramen. Then, the American jumped off for getting a grilled cheese sandwhich. At the funeral, the mexican wife said, "Oh if i knew he was gonna jump, I would'nt have packed it." The japanese wife said, "If I knew he was gonna jump, I wouldn't have packed it either." The American wife didn't say anything because she was hit by a bus.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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Your boat breaks down on the highway. How many squirrels does it take to eat a bannana? Squirrels do not eat bannanas but it would probably take a monkey 1.5 milliseconds.

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

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Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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Why could the red heading boy sing higher notes than the blonde headed boy? He was castrated at birth.

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Life is like the Titanic. You cruise along on course and everything is great -- until you hit an iceberg and 1,517 people die.

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what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

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Knock Knock Who's there A girl scout want to buy some cookies to raise money for my cardiac surgery?

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Why did Billy fall off the slide? Someone threw a refridgerator at his face.

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How many people like gang rape? 9 out of 10

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "Damn! I should've voted Democrat!"

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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Why is bobsledding the coolest sport? Because this is my subjective opinion.

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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What do friends and trees have in common? They will fall over if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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Why was the teenage girl bleeding from her vagina? Because I had shot her in her vagina with my gun earlier that day.

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What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

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What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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