What has four wheels and flies? A flying car.

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What's faster than a Nascar Racecar? My thoughts. -Juanita

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someone called someone else a frog

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What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

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Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari? There's no Ferrari in my garage.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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a little boy goes down stairs on xmas day he has three presents the first one was a pair of socks the second one was a football and the third one was shin pads the boy was now crying really loud santa is outside laughing why? the boy has no legs

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Finding out that your girlfriend is really a drag queen and that that is why you have never had sex. -Harrison

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Why did the chicken cross the road To walk back

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What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

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Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops