Why did the white man buy a new pair of socks? His old ones has holes.

Why did Chuck Norris eat a sandwich? Because he was hungry.

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

What do you call a black man that steals a VCR? My Grandpa, he was a Vietnam vet

Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

Why doesn't Lucinda have a penis? Because she's Mexican.

What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

What is the difference between a urologist and a can of chili? One is hot and spicy, and the other analyzes urine.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks: dude, what happened to your eye? The man replies: abuse.

Two fish we're in a tank.. Yup.

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What's worse than missing your flight? 9/11

I painted my dog to look like pizza. Someone ate him. It was my mom.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Duck, Duck who? Duck Sandwich

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

On September 11th 2001, A worker of North twin tower man woke up to find his dog had chewed on his brand new phone. He went down stairs and realized his kitchen window had been broken. Getting ready to leave for work and saw his radio had been stolen out of his car. After finally making it to work and settling down in his office he spilled coffee on his lap. Enraged, the man yelled, "How could today get any worse!?"

"What's your name?" "Josephine." "Josephine?" "No, Josephine." "That's what I said." "I know,"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

A man bets that his friend can't drink five beers in a row. His friend does it and says "See, I told you I can do it!" The man replies "No, I can't see, I'm blind."

whats the differnece between a bag of dead babies and a ferarri? nothing ill never have either

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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