Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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Your mom is so ugly that she had self-esteem problems and severe depression as a teenager due to merciless bullying due to her looks, however she overcame this, found a man who loved her for who she was, and then married him. She now lives a happy life.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Yo mamas so greasy that she has a beard

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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What does a vegetarian eat? colored penis

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Q: What's black and blue and is all over Timmy's mother? A: The bruises his father gave her when he came home drunk.

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Did you hear about the homosexual that walked out of a hospital? He just found out he was HIV positive. (ic3)

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How do you make a penguin fly? You strap it to the roof of a plane.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Banana you glad I didn't say 'Orange?'"

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Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

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what did the dog say to the cat? bark what did the cat say to the dog? nothing it ran away

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What did Dmitri say to all his friends? Nothing he has no friends

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What do you call a Jew talking on a cellphone ? Well one should mind his/her business and shouldn't call people names and discriminate against them on religious or ethnic grounds .

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Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

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A man walks into a bar his alcoholism is tearing his family apart

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whats worse than finding a holocaust in you apple...........

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What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

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What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

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Q: The president is driving down the road, when the wheels of his boat fall off. How many ping pong balls does it take to fill the Empire State Building? A: False. Vests don't have sleeves.

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Q:Whats Brown and sticky? A:Maple Syrup

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Hey I've got two stories. This one and the next one.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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