Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

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What is worse than being unemployed? Terminal Cancer

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I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

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What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

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What do you think would happen if there was a zombie apocalypse? You would just die.

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how many pancakes does it take to build a dog house? none boats don't have wheels.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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A Hispanic, a Caucasian, and an African American walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"

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Q: What did the dog say to the cat? A: animals don't talk

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's only a joke. It's not that, my wife and son were just killed in a drunk driving accident.

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What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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Why was the girl crying? Because I raped her

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your momas so stupid she s going back to school to become a responsible adult

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what's white, sits around all day, and sucks on tits? a baby.

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What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

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A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

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roses are red vilest are blue shes mine and if you take my place my fist will go in your face

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

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your mom is so fat, she uses nutrisystem and other weight-loss systems to try to loose weight.

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops