Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

A man walks into a bar. It was his push-up bar that he didn't install high enough. He bumps his head and it hurts.

Why was Justin Beiber Booed off the stage. Because I spelt his last name incorrectly.

For Chuck Norris every street is one way his way.

Who's Juan? DIS ONE

Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

Are you from Africa because you sure look likes you've got Ebola

A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

y r black people noses so big??? A= god had to hold tem somehere to spray paint them

What did the psychiatrist say to the man wearing nothing but Saran Wrap? - "That's for food. You should wear clothes instead."

Q: What starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? A: "Fred is raping your sister with a puck."

What's sad about four children going over a cliff in a car ? Four children just went over a cliff in a car.

What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing it just waved..

Tilt your screen back .

What did the little boy do when he got his test grade? Cried, it was 0

What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

what's worse than a dead baby? a pile of dead babies. what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one underneath. what's worse than a pile of dead babies with a live one underneath? the live one has to eat it's way out. what's worse than a pile of dead babies with a live one underneath that has to eat it's way out? more dead babies dumped on the already existing pile. what's worse than the giant pile of dead babies with a live one underneath that has to eat it's way out, but there are more dead babies piled on top? this is all in your basement.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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