Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

Click here for free sandwich.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can not rhyme, Show me your tits

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

What did the sad man say to the happy man? He didn't say anything he was so sad he killed himself.

Q: Why did your mom cross the street? A: Because she was so ugly that she fell off both sides of the bed

"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

EVERYBODY has a penis!!! Everybody!!!!

Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

A russian gives away vodka.

What's the time when black men take over? Poor past never.

What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

I'm rick james bitch

Anyone can post anything.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

Your mother is so fat that she will likely eventually develop diabetes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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