Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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How many types of pure breed dogs are there in the world? 701

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why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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whats worse than loseing your dog? getting raped by a clown.

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why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

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Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

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A Jew buys something that is not on sale

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

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What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

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awkies when jamie and jacob hook up, and u have to tell the dog..i maen danni that this has been going on for 2 months

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What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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