Why did the chicken cross the road? It had completed its task on the aforementioned other side and was returning back to the coop for a feeding now that the sun had set.

On September 11th 2001, A worker of North twin tower man woke up to find his dog had chewed on his brand new phone. He went down stairs and realized his kitchen window had been broken. Getting ready to leave for work and saw his radio had been stolen out of his car. After finally making it to work and settling down in his office he spilled coffee on his lap. Enraged, the man yelled, "How could today get any worse!?"

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a Sociopath with a very violent history.

knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

Why didn't the busy San Francisco business man hear his alarm clock ring this morning? A nuclear bomb blast occurred 700 meters from his front door. The estimated blast radius was approximately 100 square miles. Naturally, his alarm clock didn't make it.

Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

Why can't the black guy read? Because he's blind.

How did the corpse cross the road? They can't cross the road they're dead.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

Do you know what a rhino really is? It is a really fat and oversized unicorn

Roses are red, Metal is gray, Justin Beiber, is very gay

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

What do you call a white guy pointing a gun at someone? A member of the United States Army.

if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

Why couldn't the mentally retarded kid hear? It was too dark.

Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

Peas

What did the orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

How do you make a clown sad? You kill his family.

did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...