What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

You're mama's SO stupid that when she applied to college, they were happy to help.

whats black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down a hill whats black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him

A man works at a Doritos factory hes worked there for a few weeks and hes made the most Doritos in his line now and the head of the company gives him a promotion he now runs his own line a few months later the head of the company bob comes back to him and promoted him again to now our friend Carl is head of the Factory about two years later bob comes to Carl and hes promoted to head of the east coast he is head of 27 Factories about a decade later bob asks Carl if when he retires Carl will take over the company and he accepts bobs offer 23 years pass and bob retires Carl is the new head of the company so he is about like 65 at this point and he wants some wine so him and his buddies go for some wine Dan says Carl this lines two long so they decide to have some soda and then Jason says this lines longer then the last one so Aiden says to Carl why don't we go get some punch so they all got into line but there was no punch line a.w. j.p.

i know leaves are green because of chlorophyll but i don't know how to get a mortgage this is the kind if shit your parents pay for

What's the difference between a man and a woman? Generally speaking- biology, except in cases of transexuality.

How do you drown a blonde? Weigh her down and throw her into a body of water.

how did the kid cut open his forehead? by putting on his underwear!

a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

I used to be into necrophilia, bestiality, and sado-masochism; but then I realized I was just beating a dead horse.

What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

What's worse than tripping over your shoelace? Watching your mother get her tits cut off with a chainsaw then getting ripped apart and eaten alive by cannibals

whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

HAVE A GOOD DAY. DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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