Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

whats the difference between a ladybug and a jew? there is none

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like. The man says,"I'm feeling light today so I'll just have some H2O." The man's friend says,"I'm feeling the same. I'll have some H2O, too." The second man died.

- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

Did you know there was a black man in my family tree? He married my aunt.

What did Larry do when little Billys baseball crashed through his window? He raped and murdered little Billy for Larry has raped and murdered many children.

What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

I would tell you a joke about a blunt pencil but it's pointless

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

why didn't Lebron James give me a fourth quarter?...he forgot his wallet at home and didn't have any spare change.

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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