A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

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What did the kid with turrets say? Many swear words but he can not be blamed for this because he has a disease that make him unable to control many of the things he says.

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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Your mama is so white she helped pay for your education because she wants you to have the best opportunities in life.

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

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What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot you racist BITCH! Its ok a niggah gots altititude.

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Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

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My grandfather slipped on a banana peel. I helped him up.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

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you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Why are u crying?

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A terrorist.

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How many blondes does it take to play a game of hide and seek? One ... ;)

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Why didn't the black man finish his lunch? He wasn't hungry

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Why is mario red? His mother beat him as a child.

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Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

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roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

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Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

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How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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What's brown, sticky, green, yellow, and orange that rides a unicycle? I have no clue, that's why I asked.

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What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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