If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

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Why did the flight attendant look scared every time every time she saw a muslim get on the airplane? Because her family got murdered in front of her before she came to work

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

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Why was the baby so hot? Napalm. Why was the baby so cold? Meat locker.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

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these jokes are not funny but there funny because there not funny aaaaaaaa pissing me off

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Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

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Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

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whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

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Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

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Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

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What's the difference between an Elephant and a Post Box? An Elephant is not a Post Box. It is an Elephant.

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

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What's black and white and red all over and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her back

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What did the basketball player do before he scored a basket? Shot the basket ball

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

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Whats worse than the Holacaust? Stepping on damn Lego's. MrBounty44

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What's big and looks like a mushroom? A Mushroom.

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A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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