when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? a horse

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Ready for something funny? nothing

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[Insert anti-joke here]

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

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What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

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There is a horse sitting at a bar, and the bartender says MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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What do you get when you cross rice flour,vegetable oil,corn oil,cottonseed oil,soybean oil,dried potatoes,corn flour,maltodextrin,wheat starch,modified rice starch,sugar and mono-and-di-glycerides,malted barley flour,wheat bran,dried black beans and salt? Pringles,Multi Grain,truly original

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You mama's so fat, that the doctor suggested that she go on a diet.

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Roses are rose, violets are violet, that's just a fact, I've got aspergers.

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What were the murderer's last words before he was put to death by electric chair? "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NNNNNFHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.................................................................................................................." He then defecated in his pants.

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What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

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why are black people always so funny because they think of funny jokes

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What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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