A hard-working man, in his early forties with slightly graying hair, arrives to work earlier every day. He values integrity and dedication. His loving wife is proud of his accomplishments and her favorite part of the day is when he arrives home from a day at the office. He is close friends with the Director of HR, because he believes that we all should be respected and treated fairly on the job. Today, there is a board meeting, which he prepared for extensively, because he cares deeply about what happens to this great company. His boss greets him after the meeting is done and says, "Great job, that presentation was even better than yours usually are." It was a very long meeting, so they both end up going to the Men's Room. What does he say when his boss corners him near the urinals and demands sex? Nothing. He doesn't like to talk during sex.

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Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

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Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

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A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

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Yo mama so fat, when the waiter handed her the menu, she said "yes"

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why did bill gates sue his banks? Because he can

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9/11

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What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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What hurts like hell? HELL

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how many people were on the bus........ 0 cause the bus was parked for 45 years

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

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Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

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knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

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What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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Q: Why did princess Diana crops the road? A: Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt

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How did the black man fall of the cliff? He was gazing over and realized he had Prostate cancer and fell off the cliif.

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What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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