You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Systemic oppression.

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What did the two best friends do before the asteroid hit the Earth? They hugged each other goodbye.

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Optimus Prime: "GIVE ME YOUR FACE!" Shockwave: "Illogical. I have no face." Optimus Prime: "Then GIVE ME YOUR EYE!" *RIPP*

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Why was the little boy reluctant to approach his father? Because his father was a rotting corpse.

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why could the black person jump higher than the white person. because the white person had no legs

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

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Have you heard about the Polish princess? There isn't one. The Polish monarchy was abolished in 1918.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she went to go get an x-ray, they had to use the one they have at the zoo.

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My dad is lactose intolerant. He shouldn't eat cheese.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. I don't stalk him on normal days because that is both weird and illegal, thus I cannot come to a conclusion to what he does on opposite day. However, since he is lonely, I hypothesize that he must do something social, since the opposite on that is lonely.

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"Do you like pie?" "No." "Do you like blueberries?" "No." "I have something you won't like." "Is it a blueberry pie?" "No, I shagged your wife last night".

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Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

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What's as hard as rock and as light as a feather? Any object in the space, once the lack of gravity makes atoms to have not weight, since mass x gravity equals to weight.

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This guy went to the store because he needed potatoes. So he asked the clerk where the potatoes were at and she said "Isle fiveeeeeee!" So he went there and there were no potatoes ! hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahajhahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahhahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahahhahaahhahahahahahahaahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahaahahahahahhhhahha

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Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

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Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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Stephen Hawkings may know everything about the universe, but try to get him to tie his shoes.

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Who is the fastest kid in AA? Alex Solomos

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Why Did The Man Fall Off His Motorcycle? Because he hit a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops