- Anti Joke

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

hi jonny

What did the black kid get for christmas? Probably nothing as the social economy of the black race has been low in 2011 and hasn't raised by a penny in 2012.

Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

A priest a rapist and a child molester walk into a bar. He orders a drink

A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery.. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?” The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, and even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound; a sound like no other that he has ever heard. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, “We can’t tell you because you’re not a monk.” The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way. Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery. The monks again accept him, feed him, and even fix his car.. That night, he hears the same strange mesmerizing sound that he had heard years earlier. The next morning, he asks what the sound was, but the monks reply, “We can’t tell you because you’re not a monk.” The man says, “All right, all right. I’m dying to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?” The monks reply, “You must travel the Earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.” The man sets about his task. Some forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, “I have traveled the Earth and devoted my life to the task demanded and have found what you had asked for. There are 371,145,236,284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth. The monks reply, “Congratulations, you are correct, and you are now considered a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound.” The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, the sound is behind that door. The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He asks, “May I have the key?” The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone…The man requests the key to the stone door. The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby.. He demands another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire. And so it went on until the man had gone through doors of emerald,…. ….silver, topaz, and amethyst. Finally, the monks say, “This is the key to the last door.” The man is relieved to be at the end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is astonished to find the source of that strange sound. It is truly an amazing and unbelievable sight…. ….But I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

Why was the boy in front of the adoption center sad? He lost his lolly-pop.

Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

What do u call 30000 Mexicans rolling Dow a hill. Hahaha your mom

What device will find furniture in a poorly lit room every time? An infrared camera.

Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

what's blue , and you can urinate on it ? a rim block.

whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

DEAD ON KANE ITS BEEN ALL YOU ABD CAOIMHIN

Why did the kid need glasses? A monkey threw a fridge at him.

A man is wrongfully convicted of murder and sent to prison. After a lengthy appeals process the guilty verdict is overturned and he walks away a free man.

Whats fleash color fleash color and fleashcolor? a naked hobo rolling down a hill

What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause you touch yourself at night;

Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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