Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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Gustavo Andrade

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What do you call an black man on the moon. An astronaut you racist bastard

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What's worse that getting raped by a frog? That would never occur, as frogs do not have genitalia to commit rape.

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What word starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? Fuck.

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What do you get we you mix a ginger with gasoline? A forest fire.

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What do you call a person driving a plane? Not a pilot, they fly planes.

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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ask me if im a door yes

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i like your face... HAHAHAHAH just kidding you make me want to projectile vomit.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall?? A: It depends on how hard you throw them!!

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Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

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roses are red violets are blue .no one cares about you, your a jew.

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What did the broom say to the vacuum cleaner? "Your mom sucks."

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What smells like bananas but is invisible? Monkey farts

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Part 1 Q: what did Sally get for Christmas A: cancer Part 2 knock knock Who's there Not Sally MR

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There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

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I got a boner from the waitress touching my shoulder, please dislike this

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What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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When did the laughter finally die? When you started this joke.

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Why is red? He was just murmured by a phycopath.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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