What did one new born baby say to the other new born baby.? Babies don't have teeth therefore they are unable to talk.

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knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

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Q. Whats the worst soccer team in the world. A. Ass-enal.

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

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One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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Did you hear about the homosexual that walked out of a hospital? He just found out he was HIV positive. (ic3)

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What do u call a man pointing a gun at you? A man with an anger issue

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A blonde, brunette, and red-head were on a deserted island. The blonde said, "in thirty years or so, we'll all have gray hair."

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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whats the sad part of 4 negroes driving off a cliff? the car couldve fit 5

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How do you know if elephants are watching a movie? If a Volkswagen Beetle is parked outside the movie house.

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If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

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what do mr. potato head and micheal jackson have in common? their noses come off pretty easily

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I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

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Twelve billion Nero, you puppy dog you hot blooded latino man. Why cant I control it myself?

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Yo momma so ugly, she couldn't fulfill her dream of being a model.

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Why is my penis 2 inch hard? Because I rape little boys with it and there tight little asshole are crushing it

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Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

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Q: There's a Brit, Kenyan, German, and Colombian in one room. Where are they? A: Public School

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what happened to the frog that had a car accident, nothing it's dead

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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But officer, I did come to a full stop!

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What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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