A black man walks into a store with a ski mask on... what does he do?? he buys skiis.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, And really aggravate my allergies.

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knock knock who's there bang bang bang bang who where da cash at

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Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

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what is black and white and read all over? A penguin in a blender

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Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? Yeah, he died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause he wanted to get squashed by the giant pancake.

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which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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In my country we don't swim, we drown.

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

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Who does creatine? James Cornish

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Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

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What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

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A man walks into a sofa. BANG

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Yo mama so fat, that she's even bigger than the universe!

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What's clear and looks like water? Water.

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Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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Why did the black man drown? Because he grew up in a poor neighborhood, where no one had a pool, and so he never learned how to swim

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Yep, super duper stressed, all of the time, but how did you know?

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

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What did the dog say to his owner? Bark.

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops