Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he is no longer alive.

when chuck norris does a pushup, he is tearing the muscles in his biceps, deltoids, core, and triceps in order to make them stronger.

how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

What kind of movies do pirates like? They don't know, Somalia doesn't have much of a film industry.

Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

What do you call a fucking idiotic douchebag with ebola? An ebloa paitent

Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

What did the Japanese kid get for his birthday? Nothing, his gifts were washed away.

If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was cooked with eleven herbs and spices.

What did Sally get for chirstmas? Cancer

A man walks in to a bar. Ouch.

why did the black guy where orange shoes? Because he likes orange.

knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

Whats the difference between males and females? fe

Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

What do you call a black man with a guitar? His name

What starts with ''F" ends in "uck" and usually means excitement? A Firetruck

What do you call it one an Arab and a Jew get married? Love.

Where did Ben go after being hit by a high speed train? Underneath the train's wheels.

Q why was John bullied A Becuase he told kids that bullying was a bad and serious problem to get them to stop bullying jimmy unfortunately Jimmy killed himself because he was bullied to much and didn't want to live.

Guess where my mom lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my dad lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my aunt lives Utah!?!?!? NO!!!! Trick Question b... she's dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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