Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he is no longer alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why did the man slip on the knife? he wanted to commit suicide

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a fucking idiotic douchebag with ebola? An ebloa paitent

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A horse walks into a bar. A chicken crosses the road. Humanity is no more. Nature reclaims the Earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was cooked with eleven herbs and spices.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks in to a bar. Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

knock knock whoses there whose home whoses home who? you

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why did the black guy where orange shoes? Because he likes orange.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats the difference between males and females? fe

thumb_up thumb_down +6

If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Sally get for chirstmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the Japanese kid get for his birthday? Nothing, his gifts were washed away.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Where did Ben go after being hit by a high speed train? Underneath the train's wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q why was John bullied A Becuase he told kids that bullying was a bad and serious problem to get them to stop bullying jimmy unfortunately Jimmy killed himself because he was bullied to much and didn't want to live.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call it one an Arab and a Jew get married? Love.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Guess where my mom lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my dad lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my aunt lives Utah!?!?!? NO!!!! Trick Question b... she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What starts with ''F" ends in "uck" and usually means excitement? A Firetruck

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a black man with a guitar? His name

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops