What happens if a Muslim leaves their bag on a bus? They quickly return onto the bus and get it.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How many kleptomaniacs does t take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

thumb_up thumb_down +12

If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why was a white man surrounded by black men crying? He was in a support group for black men with vitiligo, which destroys skin pigments.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Poop

thumb_up thumb_down +12

se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's better than a stick? A stone

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why is Blake dumb? He was in algebra one as a freshman. And his nickname is angry Blake

thumb_up thumb_down +12

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

thumb_up thumb_down +12

my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A van drives into a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Not Sally."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between a educated black man & a educated white man? One's black, One's white

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why didn't the mexican make the basketball team? He had never practiced and was overweight

thumb_up thumb_down +12

why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Hey babe, do you like going to sleep without shoes on? Because most people find it more comforting to remove footwear in order to rest and relax peacefully during bedtime.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops