A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because pterodactyls along with all other dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years.

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Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

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a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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Why didn't Jenny's mom give her any Christmas presents? She was a selfish, mean, woman and didn't care about her children.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Why did Hitler kill himslef? He saw his gas bills.

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Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

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What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

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what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

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what has 2 legs and no eyes? A decapitated cat with only its lower half remaining

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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*Walk Into The Bakery* "Excuse me, sir. How much does the challah cost (holocaust)?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Horses that lose Are made into glue

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An SQL query walks into a bar, sees two tables and asks if it can join them.

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I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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