A guy forgot his 20th wedding anniversary. His wife was really mad, and said that she better have something in the driveway that goes from 0 to 350 in 10 seconds, and he quickly pulled out an AK-47 and murdered her violently.

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A blind man walks into a bar. It was a book shop.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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why did the guy die? because he got hit by a train. lolllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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You wanna see something really scary?

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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Want to here a joke? Me to...

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Friend: Do you want to go to the bar or see a movie first? Me: Yes.

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

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What did little ben get for christmas? A dead grandma

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours Stolen propety....

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Nothing exceedingly odd happened at a bar

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What do black people and tornadoes have in common? - It only takes one to destroy a neighborhood.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's

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How do you tell if an albino baby is black? Check his genetics.

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When a mommy and a daddy love each other very much... and after being married for 39 years... They get divorced

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What did the bicycle say to the fat kid? Nothing, bikes cant talk.

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Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

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What does an Eagle and a Mole have in common? The are both of the kingdom Animalia, possessing many organ systems and cellular similarities. And they both live underground. Except for the Eagle.

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Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

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What's worse than Christmas alone? Pedophiles.

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What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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What would George Washington say if he were alive today? WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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