How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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what did spiderman say before he saved mary jane? ill save you mary jane.

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Trash gets dumped Just like you

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Why didnt Steve Jobs make an iphone 5? He died

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

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What's the difference between a piece of chicken and a black guy? One is delicious and the other isn't good for your health.

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Making fun of Charlie Sheen is like shooting up in a barrel.

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Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

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What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

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A:Wanna hear a joke? B: Sure A: A joke

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This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

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Heskey time.

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Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

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A bloke walked in to a bakers shop and asked for a loaf of bread. Certainly sir, said the assistant, white or brown?...it doesn't matter, answered the man, I've left my bike outside

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What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

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What did the Chinese man say to the black man? I'm Part of my Asian herritage.

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How do you get a elephant in a fridge? You open the fridge and put it in. How do you get a Rhino in a fridge? You take the elephant out and then put the rhino in. All the animals in the animal kingdom are at a meeting, what animal isn't there? The rhino, his in the fridge. How do you cross a river full of alligators? Walk across the allligators are at the meeting.

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Knock Knock No solicitors

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How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

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Correctional officer asks an inmate. "Does your elevator go all the way up"? Inmate replied. I don't know we always use the stairs.

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What did the farmer say to the other farmer? "Uh... So, you're a farmer?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops