In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs? Nothing, it cant come

A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

Why did the Jewish man bend down to pick up a penny? Because he had dropped it and required the penny as part of his payment for his food.

The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road? To End His Suffering On The Farm. Suicidal Mission.... Complete

How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

There's an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman. They are all trapped in a jail cell. Eventually they all starved to death.

What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

How dis the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

What's worse than the Holocaust? A worm in your apple.

what do the students call their red-headed friend? Mike.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

Laughter is the best medicine. No, Heroin is.

I just found my mum has Alzheimer's, I hope it isn't contagious cause my mum has it too

There is a really funny joke which can only be seen by smart people, it goes as such:

Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

when life gives you lemons, you should go to the hospital as you may have dyslexia

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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