Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

if you fall, I'll be there. -floor

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why are there only 50 states in the U.S.A The US gives territories a chance to vote if they want to be states in the US.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why cant kellen heller drive? She was born with the disabilities of being blind and deaf, thus rendering her unable to operate a vehichle.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red, and many other colors too.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is pink and fuzzy? Pink fuzz

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the squirrel say to Justin Bieber? We both enjoy nuts.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

a pope and a catholic priest walk into a bar... the priest orders... then the pope says to the bartender "I'll have what hes having." so the bartender takes out a small child and says ...."are you sure?"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops