Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

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What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing, the orphanage did not have sufficient funds to give everyone a present because they did not want to how favoritism because the orphans are already sad enough and te orphanage does not want the orphans killing them selves

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Why did I lose a card game to a cat? Cause he was a cheetah!

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What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

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http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

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Why did Johnny fall off of the swing? The swing was defective. Knock, knock. Who's there? Johnny's lawyer.

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Obama

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What shouldn't you say to a dementia patient? You already said that.

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What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

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A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Beat her with a spatula while in a mankini with a dildo up your ass!

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Tom: Hey Fred. Do you wanna hear a joke? Fred: Sure Tom! (long pause) (10 Minutes Later) Fred: Tom, I thought you were gonna tell me a joke? Tom: I did, the joke is that there is no joke.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care?

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whats worse than taking a refrigerator to the face? the holocaust and AIDs

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There is a very old lady at the bottom of a long flight of steep stairs with a large amount of groceries piled up in her hands. How did she make it to the top?? She walked.

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What did the fat kid get for Christmas? Diabetes.

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What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

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What's worse than finding a hair in lasagna? An earthworm crawling into your ear and feeding on your intestines.

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What's Brown and Sticky? A Stick

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Whats worse than one dead Baby in ten trash cans Getting raped by kobe

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What would have happend if martin Luther king was white? I don't know he wasn't so it's irrelevant

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what happened to those kids sandusky raped? who cares

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops