Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

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What's worse then falling up the stairs? Ketchup

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

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Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one.It is a very simple task for somebody who knows what to do.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

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What's the same about a clown and a knife? They are both fun, except for the clown. I hate clowns.

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What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

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Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

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Grace Ackerson

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why did the clown fall of the swing? he got shot in the head

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

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Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side.

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Why does Santa Clause not have any children? Because he only cums once a year.

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A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? Everything you own

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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What's brown and sticky? A black man's dick after raping you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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