What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

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When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

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What's another word for Manslaughter? My new Hobby

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Four blondes began their road trip from NYC to Europe and promptly drowned.

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Jim: You wanna hear a funny joke? Tim: Sure Jim: Well, if you want a funny joke, this isn't the place to be.

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What does an Asian do in a library in his school? Write one of these.

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whats worse then finding a bad antijoke on this site? finding a real joke on this site

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A- Why did the chicken cross the road? B- I honestly do not care.

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How did the black man fall of the cliff? He was gazing over and realized he had Prostate cancer and fell off the cliif.

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How come dinosaurs don't talk? Because they're dead.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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what is the difference between a white woman and a black woman.. i raped the black one

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Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

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Roses are blue Violets are red Sugar are you And so is sweet

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? He was hit by a car and died in a tragic accident.

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A man walks into a bar. Because he's had a rough day, he asks the barender for a drink. Then another... Then another... (continued) The man walks out of the bar and goes to his car. He starts to drive back to his house. He wobbly makes turns and closes his eyes every 5 seconds or so. He also talks to his boss on his phone for the majority of the ride. Surprisingly enough, he makes it home safely and doesn't harm anyone else despite the large amount he had to drink. He stumbles into his apartment and goes up to his room. He slumps down onto his bed on his back very heavily, causing the room to shake a bit. He opens his eyes, only to find his glass shandelier falling from directly above his face. His body was found by his girlfriend the next morning. I guess there's no real moral to the story then... Maybe it's: You can drink and drive, but don't put a shandelier directly above your bed... I guess? Wow. What are the odds?

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What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

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There were a dog and a cat in a family house. The dog turned to the cat and said .. nothing because a dog can not speech the human language.

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Why's Jeds head so big? Curley wurly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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