what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

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What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

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Why did the blind man have a poo Because he needed one.

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Why did the chicken not make it across the road? Because he got hit by a transport.

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She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

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Has anyone else noticed that the very least popular and the most popular anti-joke on this site are both related to the Holocaust.

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Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

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Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

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How do you get a jewish girls number check her wrist

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What do you call a Mexican guy in America? A Mexican American

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When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

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What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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Why did the blonde die? She was slurped up by a 1,000 foot anteater.

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What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIP CREAM!

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What did the librarian say at the heavy metal concert? Shhhhh

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A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

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Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

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Hey how is your wife and my kids

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What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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