KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

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What is Brown And Sticky ? ......... a Stick

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who would win in a gang battle? WEST COAST SWAG

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* Are you deaf? * Yes, as I love paradoxes.

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Why did the girl commit suicide? She got raped

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A magician tells the boy to get into the box and locks him in. He wasn't a magician.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

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What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

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How old am I? If you guessed correctly, you are psychic. If you guessed incorrectly, I will send flying gnomes to capture and torture you. Unless, of course, you are of a racial minority in which case nothing will happen to you because I am not racist. :P

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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Why is our country going downhill? Because going uphill is harder.

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A priest sneeks in to a pre-school and is arrested shortly after for tresspassing.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? I don't eat pizza

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was among thousands of men who were also from Nantucket.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Who the hell knows..?

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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If i was given a penny every time i hear "It's not my fault". I will have the money equal to the nominal price multiplied by the count of times i heard that phrase.

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What did Jay Z say to his long lost friends? Allow me to reintroduce myself, my names Jay - Z

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops