Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

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what did the blind kid boy get for Christmas? he doesn't know because his parents are mute.

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If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

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What's long and black? A long and black object.

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Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcohol and it is killing his family.

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

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What did the black kid get for christmas? Probably nothing as the social economy of the black race has been low in 2011 and hasn't raised by a penny in 2012.

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Why did the Old Lady cross the road? Because the worm selected her as a weapon

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Q:How many cavemans does it take to screw in a lightbulb A: None there was no electricity back then

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how come the tadpoles dad told him he can't be a nurse? he has 2 b a frog!

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what did the orange say to the apple? hi

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Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

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If omar has 7 apples and his bus is 7 minutes early, what is the mass of the sun? Pi. Partially because the piece of paper couldnt dance with your mother.

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Q:Whats not funny? A: Antijokes

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a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

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Why are black people afraid of lawn mowers? Because whenever you start it, it says run nigga nigga.

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What did the mexican firefighter name his 2 children? Jose and Juan.

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Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm gonna screw you and you don't have a clue !

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops