Why did the plane crash The pilot, being an uneducated pilot, crashed the plane as he didn't have proper training, and the whole of the passengers died.

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Did you hear about the guy that told bad jokes? No.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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You're mama's so stupid, she decided to go back to school and finish her degree in Russian Literature to improve her self-esteem and maybe -- just maybe -- save her marriage, which had been on the rocks, mostly due to her intolerable self-loathing.

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Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia......

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how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

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What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

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Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

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Why is the sky blue? Because it is

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I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

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Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

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What's worse than finding a hair in lasagna? An earthworm crawling into your ear and feeding on your intestines.

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

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"I see," said the deaf man, to the blind man, who had no ears.

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What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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why did the grandmother forget her grandsons name? she has Alzheimers so she is slowly forgetting all her relatives

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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