A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

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Women's rights.

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A man walks into a bar with a dog. The bartender says that there are no dogs allowed, but the man says that he is blind. So the man sits down with his dog and asks for a drink. The bartender decided to check to see if he was really blind, so he says, " Hey, do you know what time it is?" The blind man replies, "7 o'clock," The bartender says, "Ha! You said you were blind! Get out of..." but was interrupted by the man, who promptly said, "No, I'm deaf," and left.

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Why is Timmy afraid of x-rays? The last time Timmy had an x-ray, the radiation was too much for him, giving him terminal cancer, which also explains why he will die in the next 24 hours.

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What is Abraham Lincoln's favorite website? Wikipedia. It's very informative. On second thought though, the Internet had not been invented yet back in his time.

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guess what what ...

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

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your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocausts.

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why don't asians use this finger (point at pinky)? because it's my finger.

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What did the one midget say to the other midget? We r both small

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Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because I pushed him.

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Why was Jimmy sad? Because he has a frog stapled to his forehead

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casey, that is all, ruddel, that is all, hi mark

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops